Author: Brooke F.

I’m a college student who has unrealistic dreams of being a famous authoress who writes mystery novels. Either that or a goblin... haven't decided which. I live on a farm up on a hilltop where the wind likes to mess up my hair and the trees sway poetically in the wind.

Insults to keep up your sleeve

~ Brooke F. ~ Leave a comment

Things to call people you dislike

(Because swear words are somewhat boring, not to mention crass.)

1.You moist sock. 

A solid insult that is a good go to. Note the usage of moist. Any insult with the word moist thrown in is automatically superior to any insult without. Like, just listen to word (or read it in your case, I’ll be nice and make an exception). 

M-O-I-S-T

Make certain you draw the “oi” sound out as long as humanly possible. That’s how you know you’re doing it right. 

2. You absolute doorknob

Vague and yet insulting. The “absolute” helps convey that the receiver isn’t just “a doorknob”. They are 100%, completely, without the shadow of a doubt, an absolute doorknob. Extra points for being assertive. 

3. You itchy pants tag. 

While the previous insult banks on being vague, this one is strangely specific and yet it manages to acutely convey your general dislike towards a person because no one, I repeat, NO ONE likes an itchy pants tag. 

4. You can of Spam. 

Because spam is spam. 

5. You oatmeal raisin cookie

A good insult to call someone who is a general disappointment because, as we all know, raisins IN cookies is the peak of disappointment. 

6. You wretched table corner that I always bang my hip on. 

An insult reserved for those inconveniently in the way all the time. Reserved for when Calling people a simple “stumbling block” does. Not. Cut. It. 

7. You expired coupon

A wonderful synonym of useless.

8. You unnecessary Disney sequel 

This one is for you nerds out there. And by nerds I mean me.

Senioritis Playlist

~ Brooke F. ~ Leave a comment

Highschool has gone way to fast. It feels just like yesterday I was turning 13. Is that a sign of getting old? Maybe. Either way, as my graduation day grows ever nearer and my highschool days to a close, I can’t help but find comfort in these songs. I’ve made a short playlist so maybe they’ll help you too, especially if you’re going to be moving on from school soon.

  1. OneRepublic – Marching On
As a pessimist, I’m always in need of constant reminders that’ll I’ll make it through things. This songs happens of be one of them.

2. The Arcadian Wild – The Graduate

One of my favorite songs, this one encompasses exactly what it feel like to grow up.

3. Rob Drabkin – It’s a Beautiful Day

For someone with the name “Drabkin”, this guy sure did write an uplifting song…

4. Sleeping At Last – Life

5. Hercules – I Can go the Distance

Disney songs are always the bomb.

6. Avicii – Wake Me Up

7. Shawn Mendes – Something Big

8. OneReplublic – I Lived

9. Owl city – The Verge

10. Rachel Platten – Fight Song

Is the Glass half-full or empty?

~ Brooke F. ~ Leave a comment

Is the Glass half full? Is the Glass half empty?

But doesn’t it depend? If you filled up the glass to the halfway point, wouldn’t you be more in inclined to say it is half full? But what if you filled it up and then poured out half?  Now it seems half-empty.  I guess how a person sees their glass depends on the circumstances around it and their particular glass… so maybe it’s not quite as simple as sorting people into optimists and pessimists. It’s true that maybe some of us are better at seeing the silver lining and others. Maybe some of us are natural born cynics. And maybe the human psych is just a little bit more complicated than that…

But all that being said don’t forget to drink your water in the first place. And I’d recommended doing it through a crazy straw. Cause those things are awesome.