Author: Brooke F.

I’m a college student who has unrealistic dreams of being a famous authoress who writes mystery novels. Either that or a goblin... haven't decided which. I live on a farm up on a hilltop where the wind likes to mess up my hair and the trees sway poetically in the wind.

Where to leave your perfectionism

~ Brooke F. ~ Leave a comment

When I was younger, I wasn’t worried. Not In the least.

I would wake in the morning with a light feeling in my chest and a carefree air about me. I would set out armed with a stick and go play in the woods and in the mud in search for adventure. 

I would crawl through culvert pipes and pretend they were entrances to magical worlds, rabbit holes to far off places. 

I would climb up to the highest part of a tree, and where the branches would meet at the center was a throne that I imagined was made for me. I would sit there and overlook my kingdom and pretend I could talk to the birds as the flitted past, giving me news of the worlds beyond. 

Then I would return home and write of my adventures in a notebook and draw maps of the new kingdoms I had conquered and discovered. Page after page I would fill with drawings and notes, describing the magic that I had found that particular day. 

But that’s not the way things are anymore. Now I’m worried, scared even, bogged down by fear and perfectionism. The stories don’t come as easy as they used to and the feeling of lightness and the glow of curiosity no longer radiates in my chest. 

Many times I have rested my pen on a blank page only to be met with a emptiness of mind and spirit. And on the rare occasions that I would actually write something, I would return to it, and rip its pages away because it was not perfect. 

I still relished the feeling of pages beneath my finger tips and the smell of new notebooks but I could never bring myself to fill them with the same colorful stories that I used to create so many years ago. 

But there came A Day I was tired of it. Tired of being perfectionistic. For my fear of creating something substandard drove me to create nothing at all. 

So I took with me a journal, perfect and empty, on a walk. More times than I’d like to admit, I had wanted to fill this book with a great many number of ideas and drawings but I could never bring myself to mark up it’s crisp, empty pages. 

So I walked to a pond’s edge and looked out upon its reflective surface, unblemished and smooth like a mirror. At its shore, I tied a string around the book and left a long tail that I could hold onto. And then I cast it as far as I could into the water. 

I reeled it in, the journal now a soggy pulp of pages. So I took it home and dried it. 

It was not longer perfect. The pages were wrinkled and the cover was beginning to peel. But that was alright. 

So I set it on my desk and opened it and began to write. 

Making A Difference

~ Brooke F. ~ Leave a comment

Often, when people are asked if they can make difference, their minds turn to big things. I could become famous and advocate for just causes. I could become a scientist and make big, important discoveries that aid the entirety of mankind. I could become a scholar and help spread knowledge throughout the world. And while all of these things are fine, statistically speaking, many of us aren’t going to be famous. Many of us are going to work jobs that many people consider menial. And I am of the firm belief that there is no shame in that. Because I have learned making a difference isn’t just about the big things but the little things.

The little choices that we make day to day are how we make a difference. Little decisions that pile up. Little things that make the world just a little bit better. Things that make the world just a little bit brighter.

Little choices like choosing to be kind. A smile will go a long way. And while a bad attitude is contagious, the same can be said for a good attitude. Small gestures of kindness can completely flip someone’s day around. You never know how you might impact someone, by simply being kind.

Little choices like choosing to be honest. The dishonest may seem like they obtain their goals quicker and easier, but in the end, your integrity matters, even if it’s just to you. Because when you choose to obtain your goals by being honest and working hard, even when others aren’t watching, it allows you to appreciate the value of hard work. Make your promises and handshake mean more then pen and paper. Show people that hard work and honesty is worth it in the long run.

Little choices that allow you to better yourself. Choices like choosing to get up early. Choices like choosing to work out instead of watching TV. And of course, eating healthy. But bettering yourself is not just limited to physical achievements. You can better yourself emotionally by choosing to let things go and choosing to be happy. Choices like these not only make your world brighter, but can encourage others. Because the quicker the world realizes that everyone has the choice to be happy, the better the world will become.

Little choices like choosing to support what you believe in and standing up for it. When you believe in something, stand up for it. But in doing so, don’t keep your ears and heart closed. Listen to the opposing position. Think about what you believe and test it to see if it holds true. And if it does, hold onto it and support it. Not just with your words, but your actions. Too many people believe in their position, but not to extent of actually doing something about it. Their belief will never make it beyond their phone screen and therefore never make a difference. Take what you believe in and act. Make your beliefs not only posses your mind, but your hands.

This all goes to say, that the sooner you realize that a big difference comes from a lot of little choices, the more likely you are to make a difference. Big differences are composed of many little events, many little people, and many little sacrifices. This is why I am of the firm belief that anyone can make a difference.

A Lesson In Statistics

~ Brooke F. ~ Leave a comment

All throughout my high school career I have known two things: one, I was good at English. Two, I was not so good at Math. Not terrible mind you, just not good. But I was always able to “get by” as they say. I worked hard enough doing additional research on math concepts that I was able to get a “B” and move on. But this was not so by the time I reached my senior year. I had to pick my final math, and my options did not look good. Calculus? Sounds scary. Trigonometry? Sounds super scary. Statistics? Eh, I’ve never really thought about it. But how bad could it be compared to my other two options?
Turns out, pretty bad. At least for someone who was never really good at Math in the first place. I think it would have been a challenge for those who were average at it, but doable. I, on the other hand, was just trying to keep my head above water. All my life, I had never, ever failed a class (this was partially due to the fact that my parents had a pretty high standard as far as my grades went and a F, D, or even a C would never do). But as I forged onward in the course, my grade point average just got lower and lower. At this point, if I got a another single bad grade, it would lower my grade to a failing one. I was at a loss. I had done the worksheets, read the lesson slides, and watched the tutorials but for some reason or another, it just wouldn’t click.
I told my mom about this and she thought a moment before saying, “Have you tried reaching out to your teacher?”
In short, the answer was “no”. I had always managed to get by without help. I hated bothering people (even though this was literally their job). I just didn’t like asking for help.
But as I continued to struggle in my class, I thought about it more and more. And finally, I was struck with an epiphany.
I always found it weird that when baby animals were born, they learned so much quicker as compared to a human baby. Deer walked within minutes of birth, the same for cows. Ducklings within days of hatching could swim. Baby Chicks were pecking along side their mother’s within a weak. Humans? Well, we can’t even hold up our heads. Pretty much all we can do for a long time is cry. And that’s when I realized that babies learn the most important skills for survival first. For ducks, it’s swimming. For Deer, it’s running. For Chickens, it’s pecking. And for people, it’s asking for help.
And so I did.
I messaged my statistics teacher in a plea for help of any kind, and through a series of quick emails, he directed me to a resource folder that I didn’t even know existed. Inside, it contained tables that were detrimental to my course work. He also sent me links to various live-lessons and video clips that expounded upon my lessons.
And just like that, my grades started improving. And now whenever I don’t understand something, I know exactly where to go. I feel like even if I don’t understand something, I’m not at my wit’s end. I still have plenty of resources and tools that can help my understand a concept better and, eventually, help my pass the class, not just with a passing grade, but a good grade as well.
Now, thanks to my high school career I know two things: One, I am good at English. Two, I’m not a natural at Math. Three, that’s okay, because I should never be afraid to ask for help.

Diary of Weird Black Holes

~ Brooke F. ~ Leave a comment

Black holes are weird and little bit scary. When I was a kid and first learned about them, I was constantly fearing that our planet would be sucked away by one of inky vacuums. But, as I got older, I learned that objects in space are getting farther and farther apart. And I can’t say I’m disappointed considering these weird monstrosities. But, somehow, I can’t help but be morbidly fascinated with them.

Here are a few of my favorite terrifying, but oh-so-hungry space holes.

Lets start with The Biggest.

Now, defining how big a black hole is is kind of difficult concept in of itself. Because they are black (as the name suggests, duh) its kind of hard to see where they begin and end. But, we can see the effects of them. We call this area where black holes interact with the rest of the universe the event horizon. That is where the magic happens.

So, scientists have stumbled upon area of space with black holes whose event horizon is the biggest they have ever seen. The gravitational range, or “event horizon,” of these black holes is about five times the distance from the sun to Pluto. For comparison, these black holes are 2,500 times as massive as the black hole at the center of the Milky Way galaxy, whose event horizon is one-fifth the orbit of Mercury.

One of the biggest space suckers that they have found is 9.7 billion solar masses which is so huge that my little human brain is have trouble comprehending. I can’t really think of a comparison but let’s just say the word “big” falls very, very short as a descriptor. But this isn’t even the biggest one they’ve found. Scientists have found in NGC 4889, the brightest galaxy in the Coma cluster more than 335 million light years away, has a black hole of comparable or larger mass.

The Cannibalistic Black Hole

Black Holes aren’t picky eaters- they’ll consume pretty much everything. So it should be a little shock to scientists that when a bigger black hole encounters a smaller one, it won’t hesitate to consume it as well.

Using NASA’s Chandra X-ray Observatory, investigators detected two black holes at the center of a galaxy dubbed NGC3393, with one black hole about 30 million times the mass of the sun and the other at least 1 million times the mass of the sun, separated from each other by only about 490 light-years. Now that might sound like a lot, but in space, especially where black holes a concerned, that’s not a lot of elbow room.

Its a strange concept if you really think about it.

What happens when nothing collides with nothing?

Well, apparently, according to science, it makes a whole lot of nothing. A lot of violent confusing nothing, but nothing nonetheless.

Because Black holes are basically weird distortions of reality, when they merge, it’s really hard to say precisely when that moment is. As the colliding black holes become very close to one another, just seconds before the final merger, their gravitational fields and velocities become extreme and the math becomes far too complex for standard analytical approaches. 

However, we do know, that by the end of it, we’ve got one big space sucker that is a little bit less than the mass of the two holes added together.

The Black Hole that Spits Up

Sorry for the very un-cool wording, but when it comes to space, the english vocabulary becomes very lackluster I’ve found. But that’s neither here, nor there.

The point is, my human friends, that Astronomers have found a black hole that doesn’t just inhale, but exhales as well. While observing a black hole called H1743-322, which harbors five to 10 times the mass of the sun and is located about 28,000 light-years from Earth, scientists have found that it apparently pulled matter off a companion star, then spat some of it back out as gigantic “bullets” of gas moving at nearly a quarter the speed of light.

Basically spit up, right?

Rogue Black Holes

Hopefully this name makes up for the last because that sounds pretty cool.

So what is a rogue black hole exactly?

Well, when galaxies collide, black holes can get kicked away from the site of the crash to roam freely through space.

The first known such rogue black hole, SDSSJ0927+2943, may be approximately 600 million times the mass of the sun and hurtle through space at a whopping 5.9 million mph (9.5 million kph). Scientists think that hundreds of rogue black holes might wander the Milky Way.

How’s that for a scary bedtime story?

The Brightest Black Hole

Seems kind of silly doesn’t it? That something that is called a “Black Hole” can be bright? Oxymoron much. But black holes have never really been ones for obeying the physical laws of matter, energy, and so on.

As supermassive black holes at the centers of galaxies suck in surrounding gas and dust, they can spew out huge amounts of energy which can appear in the form of light. The brightest quasar we see in the visible range is 3C 273, which is roughly about 3 billion light-years away.

The Fastest Spinning Black hole

Sometimes the way illustrations in textbooks show black holes, is a model that resembles a spinning top. This actually isn’t super far from the truth as some black holes are actively spinning and at tremendous speeds. One black hole called GRS 1915+105, in the constellation Aquila (The Eagle) about 35,000 light-years from Earth, is spinning more than 950 times per second. This is an insane amount of speed. To give you an idea of how fast this is, an item placed on the edge of the black hole’s event horizon would spin around it at a speed of more than 333 million mph (536 million kph), or about half the speed of light.

All that to say, black holes are weird.

Diary of Weird Planets

~ Brooke F. ~ Leave a comment

55 Cancri e

You’ve heard it rains diamonds on Saturn and Jupiter, right? I always thought that in of itself was weird. But guess what? They’ve found a planet that is basically just a solid diamond. Meet 55 Cancri e, where at least a third of the planet’s mass is likely pure diamond. Apparently scientist have theorized that these kind of planets have existed but, until now, have never really found one.

Gliese 436 b

This planet, in many respects, shouldn’t exist. Also known asthe Planet of Burning Ice, Gliese is one of the most exotic contradictions within the realm of human knowledge, for it is known to literally be a planet coated by flaming ice

So how does this work exactly?

Well, I’m probably not smart enough to tell you in my own words but I’ll give it a shot.

The ice on this planet is kept solid due to the crazy strong gravitational force emitting from the planet’s core, which intensifies with increases in depth, thereby preventing the water from evaporating as it does on Earth.

So it just burns I guess?

Haumea

Ladies and gents, I don’t think I could do this planet justice in words so here ya go:

Chickens in space confirmed?

Anyway, this little guy is a dwarf planet with a most… unusual shape? But not only that, but he has a thin ring as well and one of the most beautiful orbit patterns I’ve ever seen, resembling a flower.

Wasp 12 b

A neat little planet-if you can see it of course which isn’t likely as this planet has a unique trait where it absorbs, instead of reflects, 94% of light. It’s also weird shaped as well, shaped and oblong. But this is probably due to the fact that it’s so extremely close to its parent star not to mention its probably going to be ripped apart and absorbed in the next million years or so, give or take a few.

Earth

Alright. Hear me out on this. I know our planet does have a spectacular icy ocean, nor two suns, or is even egg shaped. However, I think its pretty cool for multiple reasons.

First off, we’re here, and, in my humble opinion, the mere fact that we exist, is pretty awesome.

Second, we’re the only known planet in the universe to have rainbows. (This is due to the fact that we need sunshine and liquid water which, for some reason, is pretty scarce in space)

Third, we’re the only known planet to support life. Period. There are gazillions of planets out there and out of all of the ones we’ve discovered, still not humans. That would leave one to believe that we are, perhaps, the weird ones. The ones out of ordinary. Because saying we’re one in a million isn’t doing the odds justice when I say that by every right, we shouldn’t here. At least by chance. And I would say, that’s not just pretty amazing, it’s pretty weird.

Snapshot: The Second Week of October

~ Brooke F. ~ Leave a comment

It’s the second week of October. I’m at a tea shop in the morning. We have just an hour before we open. Trans Siberian orchestra blares as we are putting up Christmas decor and lights. The air smells of cinnamon because the kitchen is cooking something amazing. The weather outside is nippy but it’s warm and cozy inside and we’re all wearing our favorite sweaters. I guess Christmas decided to come early, at least for today. I think I’m okay with that.

Life is good. 

5 Things Wrong with Fairytales

~ Brooke F. ~ Leave a comment

5 Things Wrong with Fairytales

So, if you have lives in America around the 21st century or so (give or take a hundred years), chances are you’ve heard or seen your fair share of fairytales. Age old classics, these stories have been adapted and made into movies for children of all ages. But having been around forever, and thanks to disney, we usually totally miss the messed up morals and strange meanings that they could be teaching us.

1. Princesses usually tend to be underage when being stalked, creeped over, kidnapped… etc.

?I also find it funny, that 16 is the magic age for EVERYTHING to happen. Boom! You 16! Time for the romance, kidnappings, and curses to commence! Kiss your parents good bye, because they’re gonners too!

2. Prince Charming has no name.

Seriously. Just calling him Prince Charming isn’t going to work say when your in trouble. Kind of a mouthful to spew out if you’re shouting for help. Ever thought about shortening it to PC or Charles?

And here’s some more food for thought…

Every prince is referred to as “Prince Charming”, and everyone assumes they are different Princes, but what if they aren’t? Sounds like we have a Player here.

And another thing, what if he wasn’t Charming? Heck, most of the princes in fairytales a nothing short of creepsters. They should really go by their true names, “Prince Creepy” or “Prince Get-a-life”.

3. Step mothers are Evil not matter what.

It doesn’t matter who you are or what you’ve done, if you are a stepmother than YOU ARE SATAN.

4. The Morals.

Seriously. You think true love is the only thing being taught through these tales? Cinderella sneaked out at night to go to a party. Snow White lived with 7 guys. The Little Mermaid made a promise she couldn’t keep. Prince Charming kissed a stranger. Jasmine fell in love with a homeless guy and a theif…

These wholesome stories are just great teachers to the next generation, don’t ya think?

5. True Love

“Cinderella’s eyes watered as she turned away from the prince to leave. She hadn’t known only twenty seconds ago that they’d become so close.”

A whole flipping 20 seconds is all it takes to develop this “true love”. How…realistic…?

Aaaaaaand that’s the end of my thinking capacity for now.

Byeee!

Snapshot: The Fourth Week of October

~ Brooke F. ~ Leave a comment

Its Saturday Night. A huge storm blew through town and knocked out all the power. But that doesn’t stop the relentless youth. I’m at a Halloween party. There are no lights to be seen except for the stars above. After adorning ourselves with glow crowns and bracelets me and my friends lay on the pavement and stare at the sparkling splendor in the skies. I think a rag-tag group has started playing catch phrase by the light of their phones. Eventually it clouds over but that’s alright because someone has the bluetooth speaker out and soon we’re learning the footlose dance. Clumsily, but we’re learning. Not long afterwards, it begins to sprinkle so we head into the garage armed with nothing more than a glow stick to illuminate the darkness. And we tell stories. Creepy ones that makes us shiver in delight and for half a second we pretend we believe them. It’s the week of Halloween after all.

Life is good.