For many young writers, the identity of “writer” takes root early. In grade school or high school, it’s easy to dream big and write even bigger. Stories pour out effortlessly between homework assignments, and the dream of publishing a novel or becoming the next great poet feels within reach. Writing becomes a cornerstone of self-expression, a part of who you are. Then, adulthood arrives like an unexpected plot twist, and suddenly, the words stop flowing.
I like to call this phenomenon The Great Writing Recalibration. It’s not just writer’s block in the traditional sense—the frustration of not finding the right words or ideas. It’s the struggle of figuring out where writing fits into the bigger picture of your life. Is it a fleeting phase? An on-and-off-again hobby? A consistent passion? A side hustle? Or is it the full-time job you’ve always dreamed of?
You’re not a failure, okay? We’re all having a hard time here….
The Great Writing Recalibration often begins when you hit the gauntlet of adulthood—new responsibilities, time constraints, and a world that demands practicality. Suddenly, writing no longer feels effortless or essential. The hours you once spent dreaming up stories might now go to a 9-to-5 job, errands, or simply catching your breath. Writing gets pushed to the back burner, and for some, it’s a bitter pill to swallow.
I know, because I’ve been there. For years, I felt like a writing failure. I had proudly finished the first draft of my novel, only to let it sit and collect dust for three years. I’d talk about how I was “working on it” or how I was “so close to finishing,” but deep down, I didn’t want to work on it. It felt like a chore. Each time I sat down to write, it was as though I was forcing myself to relive a version of me that no longer existed—the high school writer who poured her heart into this draft.
Looking back, I realize part of the problem was that I hadn’t considered the possibility that I simply needed a break from writing or that my old stories didn’t speak to me anymore. I didn’t give myself permission to grow beyond them. I was holding onto an idea of what writing “should” be in my life, instead of asking myself what I actually wanted it to be.
The key realization here is that a lack of time reveals priorities. This is not a bad thing—it’s simply life asking you to reassess what matters most. If you’ve always defined yourself as a “writer” but now find that writing has slipped down your list of priorities, that’s okay. It doesn’t mean you’re less creative or that you’ve “lost” something. It means you’re growing up, figuring out who you are, and redefining what you want.
The tricky part is coming to peace with this recalibration. For many, it feels easier to cling to the idea of being a writer and blame an ongoing “writer’s block” for not producing anything. But if months—or even years—pass without the drive to write, it’s worth asking yourself: What role does writing truly play in my life?
If it’s a hobby you love but don’t feel the need to commit to, that’s perfectly valid. If you still dream of making writing a central part of your career, then finding time to nurture it—even in small ways—is essential. And if it’s something that fades from your life entirely, only to resurface years later, that’s okay too. Writing doesn’t demand permanence; it only asks for honesty.
The truth is, adulthood is full of recalibrations. We struggle to define not only writing’s place in our lives but also our very sense of self. And in that process, the role of writing might shift, expand, or contract. Embracing that change—rather than resisting it—can help you move forward without guilt or regret.
The Great Writing Recalibration isn’t a sign of failure. It’s a chance to reflect on your passions, priorities, and evolving identity. Writing will always be there, waiting for you, in whatever role you choose for it. So take the time to decide, and remember: it’s okay if the words come and go, as long as you’re at peace with what you’ve written into the story of your life.
Keep writing, friends! Or don’t! It’s all okay!
By the Brooke 